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Landmarks of Turin Awards: Juventus vs Bologna Edition

Juventus v Bologna FC - Serie A Photo by Emilio Andreoli/Getty Images

There is something amazingly awesome to me about the fact that Gianluigi Buffon, 40 years old, one of the greatest keepers in the history of [insert your preferred name of the sport here, although all the words refer to the same thing and the whole debate about which word suits it best is of course absurdly pedantic], in one of his last games ever probably, absolutely flubs a pass to adorable tiny youngster Daniele Rugani, who sort of runs like the youthful deer he is, who kind of jogged along the attacker and caused a penalty.

Shrug emoji.

I guess it was a penalty — was it? I don’t think so. I don’t know. I remember a Walt Whitman class and the lines,

“Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself, (I am large, I contain multitudes.)”

But I suppose that’s neither here nor there.

But I think my point was that I find it wonderfully fitting that the end doesn’t really fit the beginning and the middle kind of like I mentioned over in this essay thing, i.e. that someone amazing as Buffon had this hilarious mistake that caused a penalty and his team to go down 1-0 to Bologna (lol) in Turin (!) in an attempt to win a seventh Scudetto.

Oh well, Juve won!


A tantalizing collection of titillating tidbits.

  • One of my favorite moments in this game is when the camera panned over to Miralem Pjanic and Mario Mandzukic in the stands, who were just chillin’ in their street clothes, and it looked like Pjanic was watching the game but Mr. No Good was texting someone or playing Pokemon or something.
  • I for one am all in on Juan Caudrado at right back, and it’s kind of a random genius Max Allegri thing to wait until the end of the season when Juventus basically have the Scudetto wrapped up (don’t hurt me) to start playing around with the formation switch. Our favorite Colombian can be a bit irritating at times, but he offers so much more moving forward than Mattia De Sciglio or certainly Stephan Lichtsteiner, who will be leaving Turin this summer. If Cuadrado makes the full-time move to right back, then next year Max will have a definitively offensive-minded right back at his disposal (Cuadrado) who can also play right wing, and a definitively defensive-minded right back at his disposal (MDS) who can also sort of play left back. That sounds good to me!
  • So vis-a-vis Cuadrado, it seems like he’ll focus over the summer on his defensive duties. I think this is such a great move, especially given the plethora of options Juve boast on the wings. I still salivate when thinking about either a Cuadrado/Douglas Costa or Cuadrado/Federico Bernardeschi right wing and whichever midfielder is over there.
  • Teams that I’m also on: Team Alex Sandro staying. Team Rugani.
  • If Kwadwo Asamoah goes to Inter or somewhere else and makes 3 million euros per year or whatever, let’s not complain about how he’s a traitor or anything. He’s playing some really good football, and if he can get more playing time and money somewhere else then the lad deserves it.
  • Claudio Marchisio was good! Woohoo. I hope he stays at Juve, maybe gets more Serie A starts, and does his sexy man thing on the sideline when he’s not playing. Did he help Juve control the midfield? Yes, he did! But also this was Bologna, who are basically trash and I think (correct me if I’m wrong) have beaten a single team all year in the top half of the table all year (Sampdoria, no less). So let’s not get carried away with “Marchisio is the savior of the midfield” or anything.

Onto the awards:

Giuseppe Garibaldi Award

For the man of the match.

Obviously everyone and their cousin knows who this award goes to, because it wasn’t just his assists that changed the game, but it was like when Douglas Costa entered at the half he activated everybody on the damn pitch wearing black and white. People mentioned this in the game thread, and it’s totally true: It’s like some players weren’t alive until the Flash came on, and then he came on and lit some shit up and Juventus won!

Lingotto Award

For a notable demonstration in both grit and flair.

OK, my former disclaimer in relation to Marchisio remains the same here, but I thought Rugani was really good. And I don’t mean defensively, per se. But it seemed like he was being a bit more aggressive and ambitious in his passing game, his touch seemed pretty solid, and — I don’t know — he just looked like a confident center back. I thought he was really good. I don’t know why some people are just abandoning the poor kid.

Mattia Caldara and Rugani forever!