You may have heard of the whole Camoranesi-to-Birmingham blowing up in smoke. I briefly commented on why in the comments section, but recent remarks from Camoranesi's agent, Sergio Fortunato, have made me write up a post on his idiocy. And this isn't Mino Raiola-style hatred, who is a complete scumbag but does his job. (rather well) No, this is about how Fortunato, is quite intellectually challenged, and not very fortunato at all.
Here's how the Camo-to-Birmingham deal went. All of it was in fact conducted on AOL messenger, the 1998 version.
BIGBEPPE: lol camo wut up man nice sn
OriundiPothead: oh hey ty man finished a bowl right now want sum
BIGBEPPE: lol no IMing u to say get out
OriundiPothead: hey man beppe says i gots to go
LuckyMoron: wut does he know, hes samp man
OriundiPothead: no lol hes juve now
LuckyMoron: oh damn gotta quit smokin bowls with you
OriundiPothead: no cant man lol so where do we go now
LuckyMoron: kool dude let me find a place 4 u, 1 that suits your family perfect
LuckyMoron: i got nothin
BIGBEPPE: hey man call birmingham
LuckyMoron: lol how do u call to alabama
BIGBEPPE: no birmingham city FC dumbass
OriundiPothead: find anything?
LuckyMoron: yeah did it all myself, going to birmingham
OriundiPothead: thats rainy man lol no good
OriundiPothead: ok ill look at it
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: WELCOME TO BIRMINGHAM MAURO
OriundiPothead: lol wut
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: A WORLD CUP WINNER? ILL GIVE YOU FREEDOM OF CITY
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: WE GOOD?
OriundiPothead: ya y in caps
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: MY CAPS LOCK IS BROKEN AND OHGODNOWMYSPACEBARDOESNTWORKEITHER
MysteriousFIFAagent: howdy so free transfer you'll make 5mil a year
LuckyMoron: sweet mauro will like this
MysteriousFIFAagent has left the room
LuckyMoron: that's after tax right
OriundiPothead: so we g0t a deal?
LuckyMoron: ya man 5mil a year
OriundiPothead: after tax?
LuckyMoron: so is this money 4 camo pre-tax?
MysteriousFIFAagent: hell no
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: HEY SO HEARD DEAL WENT BAD, LETS BLAME IT ON THEM
MysteriousFIFAagent: ok. wrote press "clubs know why deal broke down. i cant tell you."
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: DIDNT LUCKYMORON GO TO PRESS AND SAY TAX REASONS
MCLEISHFORENGLAND: DONT WORRY ILL TELL THEM HE "DOESNT FIT OUR PLANS"
LuckyMoron: lol so were stayin
LuckyMoron: birmingham wont pay us
Krasic4Juve4Life: :( :( :(
When the move collapsed, Fortunato said something to the effect of "we are disappointed because Mauro liked Birmingham, but we have other available options." When asked about a possible transfer to Milan today, he said "Mauro would like Milan, but as of now, there are no offers. We have nothing official, just rumors."
Clearly, he has no idea what he's doing.